Monday, April 24, 2017

Jupiter in the 7th House

Here we are! This is the last article in the Jupiter series. I’ve saved Jupiter in the 7th House for last because I’ve actually already written an article about Jupiter in the 7th when I was doing my series on planets in the 7th House two years ago. Because of that, I was hesitant about even doing this article because I didn’t want to just repeat myself. But, I am thinking that my understanding of Jupiter and also of the 7th House has grown since 2015. So, let’s get into it! What does it mean to have Jupiter in the 7th House of the birth chart? If Jupiter is the place where we experience the most positive energy, the logic follows that having Jupiter in the 7th, the house of relationships, means that relationships are where you experience the most positive energy. While this can definitely be true, this placement also means that partnerships are where you can go overboard and be prone to excess, in terms of either being a partner or the partner that you choose to be with.

The 7th House is a tit-for-tat house, an endless reflection in which we see ourselves in those close to us and they can see themselves in us. This applies to one’s wife or husband, boyfriend or girlfriend, as well as to your best friend or close friend and also, potentially, your business partner. Anyone who has to have close, long-time, one-on-one dealings with you is represented by your 7th House. With Jupiter in the 7th, it seems as if you are always attracting a Lucky Charm in the form of these partners. You are very drawn toward those who seem to embody a lot of positive energy. They could be very optimistic, philosophical, or forward-moving, always taking life’s knocks with resilience and good faith. These partners, therefore, bring a great deal of spiritedness and positivity into your life. The 7th House indicates what our romantic and platonic companions will have to offer and with Jupiter in the 7th, they will seem to offer you a lot of wonderful opportunities.

This could create the kind of dynamic where you have an amazing trust and faith in these people, more than you usually do with people. If Jupiter is conjunct the Descendant in the 7th, this is even truer. Since Jupiter is what we believe, Jupiter in the 7th naturally means that you want to believe in other people greatly. But, you won’t believe in just anybody. I feel like 7th House Jupiter individuals are generally not that trusting. You possess a natural attitude of skepticism, needing to be shown something to truly believe it. As a result, you could actually have an individual perspective that is either rather cynical or that requires a great deal of reasoning and evidence. In terms of your singular point of view, just believing something for the sake of believing it may not be appealing and may actually seem quite stupid to you. After all, that’s how people get conned!

However, when you get close to someone, something happens to you. Another side of you emerges that really yearns to have faith and to have something to believe in. The 7th House shows how we adjust our regular behavior in our close, one-on-one relationships. With your significant other or close friend, your skepticism can subside in order for a more pure-hearted, uplifting, and even surprisingly na├»ve side of you to emerge. The 7th House is not just about the sort of partners we attract. As I say all the time, it’s also about the kind of partner we are to our romantic companion or our best friend(s). So, Jupiter in the 7th means that in order to connect to these people, you express more faith and more positivity. This is usually because of their own faith and positivity, compelling you to meet them halfway and be more upbeat like them. 

The sign that Jupiter is in shows exactly how this dynamic will occur. Jupiter in the 7th in Capricorn means that you will display positive energy in your personal relationships in a way that focuses on never giving up, being self-sufficient, and persevering with the right attitude. Jupiter in the 7th in Libra, on the other hand, means that a connection will take place that brings out a positivity within you that makes you focused on keeping things balanced, harmonious, and fair. In any case, it can seem as if the partner gives you something to believe in. But, this is the potential drawback of the 7th House. It can breed co-dependency and with Jupiter here, you may be too dependent on the other in order to feel positive and to have faith. You might feel like, without them, your spirits would be flattened and you wouldn’t really know how to appreciate life.

The fact that Jupiter represents one’s beliefs means that there is also the potential that you could be far too dependent on your partner to tell you what to believe. In your purely individual expression, you can be so rational that you prefer logic over conviction. So, your partner can really convince you of their point of view because they believe what they believe so strongly that they treat it as fact, not opinion. Since you may have trouble having strong beliefs on your own, the sheer power of their enthusiasm and opinionated energy can easily sway you. In spite of your skepticism, you also can be very open to new ideas. This is because, as an individual, you don’t believe that strongly in much. Your significant other or your best friend, however, can be so insistent on their beliefs that they eventually wear you down because you generally don’t care that much, anyway.

On the flip side, the 7th House Jupiter also means that you can be the one wearing down the other person with your overly opinionated ways. Since this outspoken side is the “other half” of your nature that is less acknowledged by you, it can take some time for you to really understand this about yourself. You might, instead, spend a lot of time complaining about how the other person is always shoving his or her beliefs down your throat. Sometimes, you can believe so strongly that you’re in the right that you don’t budge or you spend a lot of time trying to convince the other person. This is quite antithetical to your overall behavior, so it can catch you by surprise. It’s not until you start hearing the complaint that you’re overbearing, you’re too much, or that you always think you’re right that you have to stop and do some reflecting.

In spite of the 7th House’s reputation for harmony, I think one of two outcomes are possible with Jupiter in the 7th. Either you get into close relationships that are so peaceful, agreeable, and harmonious that it’s all way too good to be true or your partnerships are so full of conflict that you are constantly striving for harmony and compromise. The latter is going to be true if you have a square or an opposition to Jupiter. The 7th House is, after all, a constant balancing act and we should not forget that Jupiter is about excess. Because of this, Jupiter in the 7th could actually be one of the more troublesome placements for Jupiter. Excess and harmony do not really go together. So, things may be thrown out of balance all too quickly in your relationships. Even if it’s excessive harmony, all of that compromise, niceness, and sweet talk will get old quickly. Plus, Jupiter is about standing up for what you believe in. So, it’s actually very likely that a lot of conflict could occur because both parties’ beliefs are so strong. This is when you get the constant arguing and the constant insistence, from either side, that they’re right.

The thing is that you both may have the best of intentions. But, with the dark side of Jupiter, we often see that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. You both may be trying your absolute best to make it work and make each other happy. The thing is that you are both trying too hard to make the relationship work, to the degree where you either go over-the-top to find happiness with one another or you go overboard trying to resolve the conflicts between you. Jupiter in the 7th House can manifest as a marriage where you are always talking about what’s gone wrong in the marriage. It can be the two best friends who are always texting, always attached at the hip, always interfering with each other’s lives. It can also be the couple who keep smiling their way through their relationship, convinced that with enough positivity, all of these problems will go away.

I love the whole “marriage myth” that Dana Gerhardt, my favorite astrologer, came up with in regards to the 7th House. I definitely have to credit her because this is not my idea and I love how spot-on it is. She basically says that the 7th House is indicative of the way we viewed our parents’ relationship and how, as a result, we go about our own relationships as adults. There is so much complex psychology involved in the 7th House and this is definitely one element. So, you would think that, with Jupiter in the 7th, the person is the product of the best marriage ever. It could certainly seem that way to many people with this placement growing up. Your parents may have seemed like the best couple in the world and in your relationships, you are always striving hard to meet their exceptional standard, which taught you to believe in love, compromise, and finding your equal (even if you don’t realize it).

Yet, it could also definitely happen the other way. Jupiter can actually be a disastrous area of the chart, in certain ways, if not undertaken with enough balance. And there are some 7th House Jupiter folks who witnessed a marriage or a union that was highly unbalanced: too much fighting, too much resentment, too much ego, too much insincerity, etc. It all can depend on the sign that Jupiter is in. If the 7th House Jupiter is in Leo, it may seem as if the parents constantly tried to dominate one another and if Jupiter is in the 7th in Cancer, there could have been too much moodiness, neediness, or insecurity. And the thing is the child is usually caught in the middle. Kids with 7th House planets usually act as the “go-between” figures for their parents in times of conflict, helping them serve as the mediator figures that they grow up to be. 

It's no wonder why, as an adult, you could feel so restless and so insatiable in your relationships. Jupiter in the 7th isn’t always the best indicator for stable, long-lasting relationships. If you are a product of the ideal marriage, you might always seek out partners, particularly romantic partners, who live up to that ideal. If they don’t, you could easily look for the exit. If you are a child of a messy marriage, then you might be so used to that messy way of connecting with people that you don’t realize anything is wrong. The 7th House Jupiter can exhibit great foolishness or naivete in thinking that fighting all the time, being totally passive-aggressive, or partaking in other forms of psychological warfare is completely natural and fine in a relationship. You may be so accustomed to these overblown relationships, thanks to your parents’ marriage myth, that when you’re in a ridiculous relationship, you don’t believe that anything is wrong.

But, this is what could also lead to rampant divorces, a string of break-ups, or friendships that end in just as much heartbreak. If not careful, Jupiter in the 7th House can become a total heartbreaker, just because they are so ready to move on to another relationship. The good thing is that, well, you can move on very easily. But, usually, it’s for the right reasons. If the other person is not allowing you to grow, then you don’t see the point. Also, if you feel like you’re holding the other person back, you can find it within yourself to let them go and with no hard feelings. This is a big part of your expectation in relationships: you feel like both people should be growing. So, feeling stagnant with your romantic partner or best friend is something you can usually take as a sign to move on with your life, believing that this is all happening for a reason. Relationships are nothing but growing experiences for you.

Life opens up for the 7th House Jupiter individual when they adopt this perspective. It means that you can attract a limitless amount of people your way. As long as someone can bring something good into your life, you don’t have much of a problem getting close to them. In fact, it can get to a point where everyone is seemingly your best friend. Jupiter in the 7th usually makes for a very easy person to connect with and get close to because you are so eager for companionship and so open toward whoever comes your way. For this reason, finding yourself a mate is probably downright effortless, as well. You are similar to Jupiter in the 5th, in this way. But, with the 5th House Jupiter, the person finds it very easy to get dates, to gain general romantic attention, and to embark on flings. The 7th House represents the commitment phase of romance. And it can be astonishingly easy for you to commit; sometimes too easy. You can go out on a date with someone and a month or two later, it’s like you’re already married (and I wouldn’t put it past you to actually get married after a couple of months, either, if it seemed like the right person).

This is the potential recklessness of Jupiter at play because Jupiter in the 7th can be notorious for moving too quickly. You can be so ready to benefit from the relationship that you completely jump in. If anyone is prone to overeager engagements or too-soon milestones, like moving in together very suddenly, that worry their friends or relatives, it’s this person. You might even take to considering someone your best friend too quickly and want to be fully involved in their life. Yet, it is not necessarily out of a desperation or neediness, although it could be the case, depending on the Jupiter sign. It is more so that you see relationships as such an adventure and you don’t spend nearly as much time hesitating as the rest of us do. Love is like skydiving or bungee-jumping to you. If it’s not crazy or wild or risky, you don’t really want to do it.

In a way, it’s quite a beautiful philosophy because you are so willing to risk so much on someone if you feel like they are important enough. In the end, Jupiter in the 7th House individuals can come out on the other end with wonderful memories of a marriage or relationship, no matter when or even how it ended. You can be the ideal co-parent, still engaging with your ex-husband or wife as if all of that history never even happened. You might also just find it very easy to remain on amicable terms even if there are no children involved and even if it’s a former friend we’re talking about. Then, of course, you also get the Jupiter in the 7th House person who is a part of a really lovely marriage that reminds them, every day, of how much they are loved. You can also see people with this placement in wonderfully supportive long-term friendships that really go the distance. Your best friend may be the most amazing person in the world to you, even more than your romantic partner, and everyone else may agree that you two might as well be married because they are basically the platonic love of your life.  

All of this can remind you to keep loving yourself and valuing yourself. At the end of the day, we do have to remind ourselves to be self-loving via the 7th House, instead of constantly seeking that love from others. It has to start within and Jupiter in the 7th House people seem to really believe that. For this self-love to happen, you have to acknowledge and appreciate the side of yourself that is philosophical, expansive, irrepressible, and upbeat. You might be close to philosophical, expansive, irrepressible, and upbeat people. But, your relationship will not be mutually fulfilling until you can see and love those traits within yourself. When the 7th House Jupiter really cherishes their inner believer and cultivates a positive relationship with this other half of themselves, they will not only find true fulfillment in their relationships but within themselves. You can create a positive relationship with yourself by knowing that, even when you have no one else, you still have an inner faith and positivity that you can rely, being your own best friend or partner when needed.

Friday, April 21, 2017

Uranus in the 11th House

Since our Jupiter in the houses series is coming to an end (Jupiter in the 7th is coming next, I promise), I’m thinking about what I want the next series or two to be. I have feared running out of ideas before but then I realized that there is so much to astrology that I’ll still be doing this blog for a while. I like the feeling of always having a series going because it maintains my motivation for writing. And I was thinking of either doing a Uranus in the houses series or a series on planets in the 11th House. Feel free to comment and weigh in on which one you’d like to see more. I personally don’t care either way and like turning it into a vote, like I did with the Jupiter series.

Anyway, we’re going to talk about Uranus in the 11th House here. So, either way, my bases are covered. This happens to be my placement; one of the altered placements of my new chart. Like with my other new placements, it makes much more sense in terms of me and my life. The 11th House is a topsy-turvy house where anything goes. Our personal will is represented by this house’s opposite house, the 5th. Meanwhile, the 11th House represents a force of will that is much bigger than us. Whether it’s the will of the people or the will of the Universe itself, there is a collective, big-picture sensibility to the 11th House that demands that we relinquish our preconceived notions and align ourselves with “movements” that are quite beyond our control.

Having Uranus in the 11th House is a real trip because this is the natural ruling planet of the 11th House. Because of this, the person with this placement eventually has to realize that there is no such thing as preconceived notions in their life. Any and every time this person has a pre-set agenda, strives to be “in control” of things, tries too hard to make things happen, things will backfire. With this placement, you end up creating nothing but chaos in your life when you try to avoid the chaos and the randomness. It’s something that I’ve had to really learn: whenever I make plans, the Universe laughs. This is a common phrase and it’s an experience that is not exclusive to the 11th House Uranus individual. But, when you have this Uranus, you experience it on a much more powerful level than others, to a degree that may make you feel like you’re going nuts.

No one is immune to their ego getting in the way and many of us can have this perfect picture of how we think that things should be. It’s essentially a part of human nature. Because of this, with Uranus in the 11th, you may fall into the trap of thinking that you can be like everyone else, in this extent. You might make extensive plans regarding the future, you may put a lot of energy into hustling, getting recognition, or making a name for yourself. But, routinely, you will feel yourself hitting a wall. The thing is that it really doesn’t have anything to do with you. In fact, if you could have it your way, well, you would have things your way. There is a rebelliousness to the expression of the 11th House. The energy here can rebel against us and we may also rebel against it, thinking we know better. So, with unpredictable Uranus in the 11th, you may easily become defiant in the face of chaos and think, “No, I’m going to get this under control.” But, then, you just can’t. There is always something that happens that turns things upside down. 

Uranus tells us where we can be free on a mental level, engaging in unexpected or unusual patterns or events that keep us on our toes. And if the 11th House is where you’re supposed to expect the unexpected, then having Uranus here means that there is absolutely no limit to the weird stuff you can get into. You find your freedom by being detached from ideas of what’s “normal”: a normal life, occupation, personality, etc. You just have to accept that you can’t live that straight, narrow, or predictable path that other people find such safety in. Therefore, all expectations are thrown out the window and all bets are off, which can be kind of unnerving but also completely exciting.

Something is always going to happen to you that throws you off-kilter. I’ve learned to stop myself from thinking, “Ah, yes, now everything is stable.” Having that attitude is the exact moment when everything destabilizes and that security you thought you had is gone. But, at the same time, just when you think that everything is insane and you don’t know how you’ll get out of this mess, something incredible can happen, at the 11th hour (pun intended), that turns things around. It’s to a level that can be quite radical. You might regularly feel like the Universe has a twisted sense of humor and just enjoys fucking with your head. There are situations that happen to you that make you think that you just couldn’t write this or make this up.

It’s an interesting contrast from the 5th House, which is where our creative talents lie, the kind that can fuel you toward writing a story or doing a scene. In the 11th House, truth is stranger than fiction. The 11th House Uranus person has an existence that is full of all sorts of odd twists and turns. But, at the same time, this is really liberating. You will eventually realize that all you can do is fasten your seatbelt (or maybe not) and appreciate the ride. Yet, being frustrated, dramatic, self-pitying, or controlling about what’s happening to you won’t make it better. It just makes it worse and worse, escalating the insanity in your life.

So, if Uranus is where you find your freedom, Uranus in the 11th shows that you find your freedom through true detachment. It’s a level of detachment that few can pull off because they may be much more used to their self-serving, self-willed efforts making a major impact. But, you can often push and push toward results and see nothing bear fruit. This is when you need to trust the Universe and know that it wants you to succeed. By aligning your personal will with the Universe’s will, things will manifest for you much more easily. The 11th House has a connection to the Universe that is different than the 12th House’s. In the 12th House, it’s spiritual and existential. In the 11th, it’s a higher New Age wavelength. But, there is more of a rationale to it and it’s more carefree, with a take-things-as-they-come attitude that prevents you from feeling weighed down.

Because of this, Uranus in the 11th House produces the utmost of free spirits. This placement is like the ultimate freedom, giving you the license to just not care about much – at least, on a personal  level – and live with the wind in your hair. I have always felt like such a free spirit because this placement is my co-chart ruler. In the end, I do just want to go where the wind blows and not have to worry about much. This is also what makes 11th House Uranus people so inventive. We are used to life throwing every curveball it can at us and finding unique ways to deal with our circumstances. Because of this, we have a knack for seeing things differently than other people, who don’t have to deal with the level of randomness and unpredictability that we do. Whatever situation is in front of us, we can see multiple possibilities as far as how it could turn out. We can also easily grasp unorthodox ways of understanding ourselves or our lives, like astrology, numerology, or the Tarot. When all else fails, the birth chart or the deck of cards may have the answers you or others need.

It's this advanced perspective that makes those with Uranus in the 11th strange and offbeat. While everyone else is on this track, we are all the way on the other side on a very different track. This is just something we have to get used to. We cannot try to rob ourselves of our quirkiness or uniqueness. Whenever we do, it’s just going to come back to us, like a boomerang. The more you try to resist your eccentricities, your wild ideas, or your rebellious nature, the more you will stick out like a sore thumb. Even if you think are pulling off the normal act, you will inevitably say something or do something that surprises people, shocks people, or makes them give you the side-eye. So, it’s better for you to just give up any pretense of fitting in with everyone else. You can’t! You’re too original and individualistic for that. Just accept it.

This certainly makes you an interesting social presence. The 11th House tells us how we engage with our peer group and our social network. Since we have a dignified placement here, Uranus in the 11th can regularly be described as a social butterfly of the first order. Sometimes, this is very true and sometimes, it’s not as true. While this placement can produce some of the friendliest and most socially adept people, that same person prefers to keep these social ties at a distance. And the thing is that the friends that you make can also keep you at a distance. This isn’t because they don’t like you or aren’t your real friends. It’s just because your peers and acquaintances can generally sense how utterly independent you are and somehow feel that they can’t intrude on all of that personal space you create without your permission.

This is the contrary element of the 11th House at play. Uranus in the 11th House makes you really love socializing and really love being left to your own devices, alternately or sometimes simultaneously. You might complain about your friends not texting you or not inviting you to go out. But, the minute someone does text you, you think, “Ugh, what do you want?” You want to be very social but on your own terms. I love being involved in my social scene but I also love just flying solo and running into people while I’m out. Then, we can hang out for a while and go our separate ways. But, when we have to text each other and plan the outing and then stick by each other all night, it becomes such a thing. It weighs me down and Uranus in the 11th can’t be socially weighed down (and even if I try to do that, Uranus rebels and it never really works out anyway). 

So, yes, with this placement, you do have the potential to be a real social butterfly. The 11th House is so famously said to represent “groups” and with its association with friendship, many interpret it as your “friend group”, which I feel is off. Uranus in the 11th defies that anyway because having this position means that you don’t want to be stuck in a friend group. You want to bounce around from one buddy to the next, forming new connections along the way. Hanging out with the same two or three people all the time cuts off your oxygen. You can, therefore, exhibit a social freedom that few display, being that person who can rub elbows with virtually anyone. While others can be predictably spotted with the same people, no one knows just who you’re going to be seen with. You possess zero pretense or hesitation in this way. I love the feeling of mingling with a lot of different people and making new friends. Plus, it keeps me independent and gives me my space to do whatever.

The reason for this social freedom is that Uranus in the 11th House people truly understand levels of friendship, more than the next person. I always say that the 7th House is where you find your close friends and your best friends. The 11th House is just your casual friends you socialize with; your acquaintances and the people who run in the same circles as you. Since there are no heavy ties here, Uranus in the 11th makes you feel free enough to just hang out with whoever. You have a few drinks, dance, network, chill, whatever else, and then you move on to someone else. Because of this, there are very few people who you are attached to. Whatever is in your 7th would tell you how you deal with your best friends. But, even with them, they have to be willing to let you go off and spend enough time with other people, too. Still, given how socially scattered you are, you could cause some disappointment when one of your buddies realizes that he or she is kind of just a number to you. Worse yet, they may find themselves replaced if they become boring and someone else is more interesting. So, don’t be so detached that you drop people like hot potatoes.

Yet, you need to maintain that detachment because it gives you a big picture sense of what’s going on socially. Being involved in a “scene” is very important to you because you’re engaging with something bigger than yourself. Hopping from bar to bar can very much be an 11th House activity, even though people often like to associate the 5th House with partying. The 5th House is totally selfish fun that just involves and serves yourself. In the 11th House, we reach out to other people and become one of the crowd. It’s a group activity. This is why being at home a lot and rarely, if ever, going out will get very unfulfilling and stale to 11th House Uranus people, especially ones in their 20’s and 30’s. I realized a couple years ago, after a lifestyle like that, that I’m much happier going out on the weekends. It’s not really about the drinking, the dancing, the feeling of wildness. It’s just about branching out toward and being involved with other people, instead of being very self-involved and disengaged from other people, which is what staying in makes you.

It’s also about expressing that combination of individuality and group-consciousness by being an active member in a social circle; that person who stands out and knows everyone. This is not an ego-driven desire because this will actually be your way of making a difference on a large scale. When we speak about making a difference through the 11th, it’s not just by spreading awareness about climate change or fundraising for someone’s political campaign. It can be as simple as being really friendly, even when other people aren’t, and bringing an inclusive positive energy that makes sure everyone has a good time and feels welcome. Uranus in the 11th gives you the power to be that person in a social scene that can unify everyone, often introducing people who’d never speak otherwise, reaching your common goal (an 11th House term) of having fun together.

This powerful yearning for social involvement is what can keep you a free bird even when you’re expected to settle down. It can be hard for those with Uranus in the 11th to be married or have families because they feel such a greater obligation to larger, less personal interests. There can be a time where you stop hitting the bars or clubs as much. But, you can still be just as highly involved in Open Mic Nights, volunteer activities and organizations, neighborhood meetings, music festivals, online communities, and anything else that keeps you connected to groups of people with the same interests and who are looking for the same things. You will only truly feel free when you can stretch beyond the personal and the one-on-one, in this way, and invest a lot of energy in the transpersonal. In the end, these groups will need your talents, your ideas, and your unique attributes in a significant way.

Of course, this can also manifest in terms of politics and social activism. It seems, though, that 11th House Uranus people can either go to two extremes before they are really any use to these higher causes. They may either be obsessed with what’s going on in the world but in a self-righteous, armchair-politician way that makes them shove their opinions down others’ throats or they may try and avoid being politically aware altogether because they feel like it may bring them or other people down. In the end, a middle ground needs to be established. You need to be invested in current and world events without being too insistent on it, either. After all, this will cause your 11th House to rebel and you will inevitably not help anyone. Instead, you must adopt an intelligent, well-informed view of what’s happening in the world while also getting involved with groups of people, in a constructive way, that will make a difference.